"Don't spend too much time 'writing' a relationship — focus on actually having one." Don't put a great deal of effort into each message; bat a few back and forth, and then "make actual plans or move on to someone who will," Safran says.
It's best to find some clarity around your desires before you drop headfirst into the dating pool, Tina Tessina, psychotherapist and author of Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences, tells Bustle. "If you want a relationship, don't set yourself up for sex and nothing more." In other words, don't just settle for the first person who asks you out. Romance, encourages the process of "shopping around": "Don't stay focused on one person until you've given yourself a choice," she says."Personal development is the key to success in dating — and in life," relationship trainer Daniel Amis tells Bustle. "Read positive affirmations — and believe that you''ll attract to you the right person." Once you've picked your mantra(s) and gotten your head right, "understand that it's a number game," the author of Unbreakable Love: Proven Methods For Developing a Stronger, More Satisfying Relationship In Just 30 Days advises.
"When you sit with a frown or a pout on your face, it turns off those that you are interested in."It's a given: Everyone you meet is not going to be dying for a second date. "Most of the people you are going to meet are not going to be the right ones, so be OK with being rejected." The same goes for you: It's totally fine, and actually preferable, to reject someone — in a nice way, obviously.
"Dust yourself off and get back in the game when this happens," she says.
"Participate fully in conversations," relationship coach Melinda Carver tells Bustle.
"Go on dates as though you are meeting new, interesting people.